Stresssssssssss

Previous post should have posted as being from October 30th. I guess because I edited it, it changed the date. I dunno...

So this has been such a long week. Work has been extra busy; apparently everyone is sick and MUST see the doctor immediately. We are preparing the go totally electronic. So the transition is causing a bit of extra chaos in the office. I'm trying to just get things going smoothly. I think it might be easy for me since I just started so I am not as used to the old system as everyone else. I am hoping that now (finally) not working the overnights at all, I will get into a normal sleep schedule and finally feel rested.

Today was my younger brothers birthday; he turned 27. Which is weird because it just reminds me that my birthday is less than 6 months away. The only reason I think of it around his birthday is because I am a year and a half younger than my older brother, and a year and a half older than my younger brother. So it's weird to think that he is 27 and I am 28. So we/I want to take him and his girlfriend out for his birthday, but now we might not have a sitter. Actually, it's more like my future MIL might be away this weekend... but she might be staying... so she is leaving us hanging until, oh something like 5 pm tomorrow. It's highly obnoxious.

Halloween was on Monday. Little Misses mother picked her up early to take her trick or treating than complained the next day about it. My fiance put fake tattoos all over The Bean; he looked really adorable... and pretty badass, actually. Little Miss has so much homework, loads of tests and then projects. And she is coming to us after school every day to help her out since she is failing; but her mother insists on picking her up early and therefore it rushes her and she can't get everything done. And I don't trust that she makes her study or finish her work at home. I'm pretty sure her mother posted on facebook the other day that they were watching a movie... at 11am... on a school day. Are you serious?! Let's just keep her out of school while she flunks out? I just don't get it. I wish I did, but I don't. Some things I can understand; but being selfish and NOT putting your child's best interest before your own is something I will never get. It drives me nuts.

It's been a stressful week. I'm not liking this week at all. And I wish I could look forward to the weekends (like everyone else seems to think I should), but if Little Miss didn't have so much work to do all the time, maybe I could rest. She has a lab experiment to finish that she never did. And she has 2 and a half weeks to finish another project. Her topic? Cancer... great. I'm sure her mom will really put effort into helping her with that. So that just puts all of it on her while she is here. Now she doesn't have school on Tuesday of this coming week, so she won't be coming over. And she doesn't have school on Friday either. This week is actually the end of her first quarter. But my fiance wants to go upstate to see his grandmothers headstone that just came in. Which means we won't be able to work on her project over next weekend. And this weekend her grandmother is bringing her to a baby shower. That means that, while it should only be a couple of hours, it will end up ruining the whole day and her progress on the experiment. Then the weekend after Veterans Day, she has a sleepover birthday party that she wants to go to. I know technically we don't have to let her go, but we do want her to socialize and enjoy things here and there, too. I don't want to deprive her of every joy imaginable. It's her first real sleepover. Maybe if we give her like a... "you have to pass all of your tests to go" thing, then she will try harder. BUT if she goes, then it's more time she isn't spending on her project. Which wouldn't be the end of the world if her mom would let her spend more time doing her work here OR make sure she does a good job and does her work at her house. But she doesn't do that and can't be entrusted to do it, even if she is told. Her mother believes "she's in middle school so she is on her own" and that she doesn't need to check her work, go through her backpack/binders/agenda book, etc. I just don't even know... I don't know how to handle this. A lot of people tell me to let my fiance take over more, but he isn't the "school" one. He struggles with it himself. He has his own learning disabilties that he never really overcame. So it's kind of up to me. And I am fine with it... except for being almost underminded because no one follows up on anything or makes her do what she is supposed to do.

I went with my fiance to go get one of our tattoos finished yesterday at our friends shop. He got his done, but it took forever so mine didn't get finished. All I wanted was to feel something other than stress. I really needed it. I need to get out and not be in a rush to get. I need a break, a vacation. I need to have someone take over for a while. Sometimes I wish I didn't care as much as I do. Then I wouldn't be so stressed...

Bah... thanks for reading.

Peace & Love,
Emily